Veteran performer Joan Jaffe makes her entrance from the rear of the house at Don’t Tell Mama in her rousing new show, Joan Jaffe Sings Funny..., holding a paper coffee cup, singing Kander & Ebb’s "Coffee in a Cardboard Cup" and greeting individual familiar faces in the audience. Clad in sparkling silver slacks and a shimmering blue top, Jaffe belted out the song from 70 Girls 70 with continuous vigor and vim. The act is specifically geared to "funny" songs and patter numbers and included four Francesca Blumenthal treasures, a song by Alan Arkin, and other rarities.

The first stand-up comic part included riddles based on how cold it was outside, encouraging the audience to chant back "How cold is it?" and coming back with super sharp lines that "it was so cold that" Governor Palin and Bill Clinton, among others, had activities that defined how cold it was, as well as the one-liner "so cold the squirrels in Central Park have frozen nuts!" Introducing her husband, Hal Blankenship, who also directed the show, she related that he grew up in a small Virginia community and was a fan of country-western music. As a tribute to him, but utilizing her own urban Jewish roots, Jaffe sang Willie Nelson’s "Crazy," with special lyrics substituting "Meshuggah" for "crazy" and detailing uproarious activities that made her "meshuggah."

As the first of her "stool" songs (the ballads), Jaffe sang a moving "You Go to My Head" (Gillespie-Coots), turning the song into a three-act play which showcased her great acting talent. After a first chorus, she gave the stage over to her music director, Jerry Scott, whose interlude on the piano was a class act. Coming back to the melody, Jaffe sang the last chorus so purely that the last note made you gasp at its beauty!

Reverting back to the fun part of the act, Jaffe sang Alan Arkin’s crazy "I Like You," and a "food" song "Bagels & Lox" (with an onion on the side). The first of four humorous Francesca Blumenthal songs was "Little Luncheonette," a song about searching for an all-night luncheonette in the city, lusting for the chrome counter, patent leather seats, the insolent waitress in a hairnet, and the type of food served at those all-night diners ("tuna patty melt").

The lights dimmed on Jaffe as multiple award-winner Scott played a concerto version of "Malaguena" so brilliantly that it stopped the show. Then Jaffe sang a humorous song about having to go backstage after seeing a friend’s dreadful performance in a play, "You Were So" by Peggy Simon Traktman, with a funny recurring lyric that sometimes went "you were so—interesting" and chattered about the props, costumes, wigs, everything but the acting performance. This was followed by a mimed bit for which she needed both hands. It was about three entertainers auditioning to perform for a hearing impaired and mute audience. One candidate was from Connecticut, one candidate was from New York, and one was from New Jersey. Demonstrating and translating their signing techniques, the results built up to a side-splittingly funny finish.

Calling Blankenship up to the stage, Jaffe and Blankenship did their clever and wonderful synchronized strutting song and dance to the Bobby Darin/Johnny Mercer "Two of a Kind" that was in the Laura Linney/Philip Seymour Hoffman movie The Savages last year. Their impeccable timing and interplay were a master class of performance art. They announced that one of the film’s DVD special features is their complete performance without cutaways!

For her second "stool" song, Jaffe recalled her first Equity job at the music tent in Wallingford, Connecticut where the young assistant musical director was Joe Raposo! Expressively, she sang "Bein' Green."

Discussing how much she and Blankenship loved traveling, Jaffe sang another witty Blumenthal song, "On the Streets of Paree," all about how public the lovemaking is all over the city of Paris, including in the restrooms, at all the historic sites, and even in the churches! She followed it with "Acapulco" (Blumenthal & Addy Fieger) about traveling with a older church group on a tour and the hunky Latin guide alone with her on top of the pyramid and what she brought home from Mexico (hint: it wasn’t anything she shopped for)!

Jaffe’s last "stool" song was Arlen and Capote’s "Don’t Like Goodbyes" from House of Flowers, which she made her own singing it so sweetly and tenderly.

The finale was another hysterically funny Blumenthal song entitled "Queens," about that God forsaken suburb of Manhattan, "somewhere between Yonkers and Siberia!" It was a hoot and the audience gave Jaffe a standing ovation! Anyone who wants to see what a class cabaret act can be should not miss Joan Jaffe Sings Funny...

Joan Jaffe Sings Funny.... repeats Tuesday, February 2nd at 7 PM at Don’t Tell Mama.

Joe Regan, Jr.
Cabaret Scenes
January 25, 2009
www.cabaretscenes.org